Cyber Girl 1.0: Booting (2/5★)

Table of Contents

Cyber Girl 1.0: Booting is a lewd sidescroller about a “female cyborg” on a quest to extract revenge upon her creator!

Adult Content?
(FxF) sexual content.

Mosaic’d genitalia.

Hours of Gameplay?
Two hours (est.)

Patch Available?
No, not necessary.


I purchased this game the day it came out, and I couldn’t even get it to boot. About a week later, the “distributer”, reached out and published an update addressing the crashes. They wrote,

Update (2021-Jul-10): There is a new build where the crashing issue has been resolved and also the controls are mapped to WASD. I play the game with an Xbox 360 controller and it works just fine! I hope you can finish your review now. Thank you for your patience.

They even remapped the keyboard controls for my convenience! I figured that I was now obligated to play this game, so I got crackin’. Not gonna lie, I was hoping to shelve this game and never come back. . .

Gameplay: overview (3/5★)

Dodge baddies and deadly spikes through methodical platforming! The goal of the game is to reach the “door to the next level”. Unfortunately, they are locked by “3 protections”, each of which represented by a designated enemy. These enemies are hard to miss, and the level design is rather linear — you won’t too much time figuring out where to go next. Chances are, you’ll be trying to figure out how to bypass specific enemies or obstacles, backtracking each time you die. Some obstacles will instantly kill you (due to a combination of obscene damage and lack of invincibility frames). It’s important to conserve your hit-points and lives, because “checkpoints” are scarce (and bosses are bullet sponges). At your disposal are two attacks, a weak ranged-weapon and a powerful melee. There’s also a “paralysis” attack which is used to dispel missile traps, but it barely works — it’s better to memorize these traps and avoid them altogether. You’re able to block certain attacks using a sort of shield, but this shield has limited usage. It’s important to manage your blocks carefully, because deaths carry a heavy penalty. There’s also a peeing mechanic, but it’s kind of a nuisance.

Gameplay: Wombat rambles

If you’re defeated before a check-point, you’ll need to kill yourself — I’m not kidding. It’s best to commit suicide until you have the option to “retry” — there’s no reason to risk resetting a playthrough. It’s not like you have any collectablel items or power-ups to preserve. Enemies respawn too, so there’s no reason to backtrack with less lives than you started with.

Actually, the whole “lives” system is stupid (now that I think about it).

There shouldn’t be “lives” in this game. Considering you’re only permitted to spawn from designated checkpoints, lives are a moot mechanic — they only make a frustrating game more tedious.

Sexual Content: overview (2/5★)

The main protagonist and most of her foes are bare naked, busty “cyber girls”. Some enemies can be “dazed” and subsequently raped, allowing you to mount them. These enemies must be utilized to traverse obstacles. There’s a “pee bar” that constantly refills — if it caps, you’ll be stuck in place until you relieve yourself. You’re able to pee anywhere, so there’s no excuse to get stuck. It’s a good idea to urinate while waiting on platforms or watching laser patterns. The artwork and animations are meh — big props for creativity, but the animations are too small to enjoy. I suspect genitalia are censored (but they always covered up anyways).

Sexual Content: Wombat rambles

The “pee mechanic” is but an inconvenience. I don’t know why PsychoGameFan even bothered. It’s not watersports that bother me, it’s the usefulness of the mechanic itself. You’ll never not have urine to spare — so why wasn’t utilized as a meaningful resource?

Maybe peeing could restore your health (it’d inflate playtime just as well as limited lives).

Maybe certain attacks would fill your bladder, adding a new layer of combat strategy.

Maybe your damage output could be tied to your bladder, creating an ongoing dynamic.

Maybe, certain obstacles could be powered by your bladder — peeing could have been more than “stop playing and press down every few minutes”. PsychoGameFan, I like peeing girls as much as the next guy, but this “mechanic” isn’t fun or interesting.

Story: overview (1/5★)

Whenever you start a new game, you’re introduced to the “story” via a series of dialogue against a black drop. Unfortunately, my Steam UI progressed the dialogue before it was captured via my chosen “screenshot” key. The only way to reread the intro cutscene is to start a game (fuck that). So instead of undoing all of my hard work, I’ll just quote the developers.

“You will be controlling Tala, a female cyborg full of mysteries and with amazing abilities. It is time to boot up her system and help in her quest of revenge against the person who completely changed her life!”

Sound: overview (2/5★)

The music is actually kind of rockin’, but it gets old — and it’s all you’ll hear for the entire game. The main protagonist makes the same few sounds throughout the game. Considering how much you have to backtrack, the soundtrack quickly turns into auditory mockery.

Visuals: overview (3/5★)

The titlescreen looks a little sketchy — like a bootleg game that shouldn’t exist. The flat-black background, stock text and weirdly skewed ladies don’t do this game any favors. Audio preferences can be adjusted in-game via the “Pause” menu (which is brought-up via the “P” key). I couldn’t figure out a way to borderless-fullscreen the application (I’m not sure if it’s possible). Cyber Girl 1.0: Booting is a visually interesting game, but it looks a little rough around the edges. I loved the creative cast of enemies; most of them are bound, naked ladies with a variety of weapons! However, the 3D character sprites didn’t exactly match the 2D, hand-drawn world.

Verdict: yeah I’m salty (2/5★)

I don’t think I can handle anymore of this game — if I don’t don’t see a major overhaul or compensation, I’m not going to bother. I’ve been very generous with time for this game. There’s other games I’d rather be playing right now. Girl 1.0: Booting is a slow, frustrating platformer in desperate need of quality-of-life updates. The “lives” system produce a game that will only appeal to enthusiasts who don’t mind repetition, optimization and backtracking. I have a feeling most of those “enthusiasts” aren’t looking for games with scantily clad “cyber girls” and rape mechanics. Girl 1.0: Booting isn’t lewd enough to be a respectable “adult game”, and it’s too trying for anyone that would be interested in this platformer. Given the content, I think the price tag is a little too high. If you can pick up this game half-off, it’s worth a try. It’s a legitimately challenging platformer — just don’t expect any “one-hand” gameplay.

Questions, requests or comments?