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CyberSex 2069 (2.5/5★)

Table of Contents


CyberSex 2069 is a lewd RPG/Point-n’-clicker about going from “Cyber Clicker” to “Cyber Hacker” by venturing feet first into the Cyber!

Adult Content?
(F, FxM) sexual content.

Censorship?
No. Woot! Woot!

Hours of Gameplay?
Four or five hours (est.)

Patch Available?
No, not necessary.


Foreword


I received a free copy of this game for review purposes — thanks LarsMidnatt!



Gameplay: overview (2/5★)


Search for passwords and fend off rival hackers in real-time combat! The goal of the game is to unlock all the lewds by “decrypting” files. Decryption is executed via “exploits” or entering case-sensitive passwords. Networks are filled with encrypted data, from “codexes” to essential information (such as more passwords). Codexes typically hold phonographic material and clues for future decryption. All information is important — no how irrelevant, it’ll probably fit into a pass code later on. By crafting “exploits”, you may skip entering passwords. Unfortunately, “exploits” don’t always work — and materials are scarce. You may acquire the necessary materials for exploits from “exploration areas”. While exploring, you must avoid hostiles to avoid wasting time. At anytime during battle, you may distribute “co-processors” into your “attributes”. Each attribute, “kinetic”, “intel” and “Energy” regenerates based on the number co-processors assigned. At your disposal are a variety of attacks and healing skills, each of which relying on a different attribute. To smite your foes, you’ll need to carefully manager the co-processors at your disposal, and never let guard down!




Sexual Content: overview (3/5★)


Supposedly, there are “350 CG images”. These images cover a wide variety of fetishes and monster girls. There’s a lot of ball licking, with a side of pegging and futas. Most of the artwork is sci-fi themed, complete with neon lights and techno mumbo-jumbo. Some of it is fantasy themed, written off as “legacy games” and “dolls that sculpt themselves”. The artwork is decent; I seldom saw clipping or visual errors. I thought the cum shots were a little hit or miss, but they’re a welcome addition to any gallery. Unfortunately, the artwork was too much a mishmash for my tastes. It’s kind of like somebody’s gallery was palmed into the game and poorly written off. If there’s any characters you like, you’re kind of out of luck. There are plenty of CGs to unlock, but they lack thematic and character consistency.




Story: overview (2/5★)


While playing a game of “Gape Shallow Anus”, you are whisked away into the “Cyber” — you should have thought twice before buying that Aurora Chair! Greeted by Kacy, she explains your situation; she likes to “convert Cyber Clickers” (you) into “Cyber Hackers”. She claims “there are much better pixels to be found”, “without the mindless grind”.

Porn?

The “Cyber” allows users to “break into remote systems and collect data or tech” for “personal use and enjoyment.” I guess the “Cyber” is just another word for “internet” or “wireless connection”. After a longwinded tutorial, she sets you free upon the Cyber. By collecting “Codexes” and hacking into personal networks, you’ll see better porn than Gape Shallow Anus could ever provide.

From this point on, you are a Cyber Hacker.




Sound: overview (4/5★)


The soundtrack is pretty rockin’. I enjoyed the sound effects and crazy electronic. As you click through dialogue, the music takes many twists and turns — it keeps your ears interested.



Visuals: overview (2/5★)


The titlescreen lets you know what you’re getting into! From “Options”, you may adjust audio and display preferences. The user-interface is serviceable, but it’s clear RPGMaker was pushed a little too hard to make the pause-menu happen. The icons don’t always look right — it’s clear LarsMidnatt spent the budget on the “CG images”. There is no gallery screen, but images can be easily reviewed by activating acquired “codexes” from your inventory. Unfortunately, the user-interface can’t be hidden. You’ll have to enjoy your lewds beside the flashing “next”, “previous” and “exit” buttons. The “exploration areas” look atrocious. I suspect 3D models were ported as sprites, but the execution is awful. It almost has that “retro” feel, but it mostly feels bad — but credit is due for consistency. I thoroughly enjoyed the “faux” loading screens and assorted advertisements. The Ads looked half-assed, but they’re great additions to the lore. Between the advertisements and unlockable “codexes”, they allow you to learn about the world of CyberSex 2069!




Verdict: not very fun (2.5/5★)


I find it difficult to recommend this game. CyberSex 2069 is all about entering cryptic passwords and “deciphering text” — that’s not a great premise for a game. Sometimes, the passwords were obvious enough for me to figure out on my own. For the most part, I found them to be way too cryptic — and unfortunately, they are critical for progression. This is the sort of game you must take extensive notes on (or spam your “screenshot” button). Ultimately, I pried apart the game files to extract the passwords (although in retrospect, I should have check for a guide). If passwords were automatically unlocked (or at least multiple choice), I wouldn’t have problem searching for “clues”. If the bulk of the game focused on exploration and combat, it might actually be fun. Speaking of combat, it’s slow and tedious. Once the novelty of real-time combat wore off, I found myself avoiding encounters. Combat simply isn’t fun. Enemies need to deal more damage, and so do you. As a comedic game, CyberSex 2069 fails (hard). I could tell LarsMidnatt really tried, but the “comedy” fell flat. You are told to “Only make exactly what you need, as needed”, “or it’s an unspoken GAME OVER.” The stupidity of this philosophy is confounding — allowing players to break their game isn’t a “feature”, it’s called “shitty development”.



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