Merge Nymphs is a lewd matching (or “merging”) game about cleaning up grime with candle sticks dicks!


At-a-glance


(Adult) Content?
(F, FxF, FxM) Sexual content.

Censorship?
No. Woot! Woot!

Hours of Gameplay?
’til Heck freezes over.

Modding Support?
No.

Patch Available?
No, not necessary.



Gameplay (5/5★)

Match groups of three or more like-objects (or “merge”) to unlock more things to merge! The gameplay is simple, but surprisingly fun! The game revolves around helpers called “Nymphs”, and harvestable “Pheromones”. Nymphs produce pheromones via designated “Objects”. Objects can be “merged” to produce higher-level variants, which allow you to harvest increased pheromones or new objects. Nymphs can also be merged, increasing their “stamina” and unlocking lewd content. Many objects are locked behind “smog” or “polluted land”; the former is dispelled as you increase the combined strength of your Nymphs, and the latter by expending pheromones. “Dead land” can only be cleared by merging specific objects — you may not think you need bananas and panties, but believe me, you want bananas and panties (a winning combination!)

Story (2/5★)

The Lord of Fertility has awoken, and he is joined by his faithful Lake Nymph (which in this universe is equivalent to naming your child “City Human”). It’s up to him to uh fertilize the land. . . and/or his other Nymph subjects? Lake Nymph is a poor exposition dump, so let’s take a look at the store page —

“Fight against the ever-increasing pollution that threatens to put an end to the lush lands of this fairytale-like world!”

I couldn’t find a name for the “fairytale-like world”. I guess the developers couldn’t be bothered to name their world, so I’ll call it “Nympho” (seems fitting!) Nympho is hope to a wide array of Nymphs, tireless warriors against abstinence! Nympho has been conquered by Golems, a mechanical species that corrupts the very ground wherever they stand. Where there’s Golems, there’s no sex — and now the Lord of Fertility is here to set the world straight!

Visuals (4/5★)

There is no titlescreen — once you’re connected, it’s straight into the game! From the gearbox icon, you may access the “Settings” menu. Audio, display and gameplay preferences can be adjusted from this menu. Unlocked CGs can be viewed via the in-game “Gallery”, which is brought-up via a sidebar in the home screen. When viewing unlocked content, the user-interface can’t be hidden — this sucks, so hard. To my surprise, Merge Nymphs is a somewhat demanding application; though I never experienced any stuttering or noticeable frame drops, my PC consistently ran moderately high temperatures. I ran this application on a laptop armed with an RTX 2060. As the game progresses, you’ll have potentially hundreds of moving characters and objects on-screen. With that in mind, Merge Nymphs may not be a good fit for potato PCs.

The Goods (3/5★)

I’m unsure how many lewd images are available; the “Gallery” does not specify what isn’t unlocked. Each nymph has around three sex-scenes and eight cards to see — I estimate there are at least thirty-six non-event sex-scenes, and ninety-six cards. Adult content is unlocked via discovering new Nymphs or as “trophies” for event completion. Cards are rather lame; they are portrait-ratio images with little variation. Sex-scenes offer a single static CG and a few lines of dialogue — some offer a single animation instead. There are no variations for expressions or climaxes. . . so lame! The art and animation are high-quality, but some nymphs have clashing artistic styles. Overall, the adult-content is decent, but I was sincerely letdown by the quantity. Seriously though, the user-interface needs to be toggleable; in my opinion, it totally ruins the artwork.

Verdict (3.5/5★)

I totally recommend this game! But keep in mind who Merge Nymphs is for. Imagine dumping out a few decks of cards and sorting them by threes and fives. . . then imagine dumping out more decks of cards every few minutes — that’s Merge Nymphs in a nutshell (minus the nut). Believe me, this game a little more fun than my example, but it’s catered for a very casual sort of gamer. Some people may find this game boring, and others may find this game relaxing. For those of you looking for a challenge, Merge Nymphs does offer timed stages and events. . . but the biggest challenge this game has to offer is micromanagement. There is no end to Merge Nymphs; once the ball is rolling, you’ll never have a shortage of things to do! Unfortunately, Merge Nymphs failed to impress me as a lewd title. Sexual content is few and far between (and distinctly lacking in variety). But if you’re interested in a time-killer with a colorful cast of nymphomaniacs, give this game a try — it’s free!


Notes about nothing in particular. . . NANI!


Valentine’s Day? More like. . . Valentine’s Pay (to win)!

I started playing Merge Nymphs during a Valentine’s Day event. The goal of this event was to acquire “event points”. There were a variety of rewards that were tied to specific denominations of points — the final reward was an “event sex scene” (or a “Valentines Day Event Trophy”). I figured this “trophy” was going to be something awesome! Forty hours and eighty dollars later, I completed the event. Was it worth it? In terms of progress, I guess. . . but that’s the eighty dollars talking. The sex-scene consisted of one, static CG. The Valentine’s Trophy wasn’t even animated.

Honestly, I feel like I just wasted my time. . . how disappointing.

I carefully micromanaged my board, getting rid of anything that might distract my nymphs from collecting pheromones. I let the application run in the background as I played other games, reaping the reward every ten/fifteen minutes. There was only five days left on the event (when the game released on Steam), and it took me at least thirty hours to get my Trophy. Thirty/forty hours in five days seems unrealistic for the average person (and I spent money to speed things up!) The whole experience simply wasn’t fun, and I think future events need to be more rewarding.

Participating in an event is a compromise (and it shouldn’t be).

To put it simply: events are too grindy and unrewarding. It would have taken me literal days of playtime (without spending money) to earn anything remotely worthwhile. You’re not allowed to keep or sell any objects from events — why this is the case confounds me. The Valentine’s Event wouldn’t have been as bad if I could at least sell whatever I didn’t need. Or better yet, if I could have kept all of the items I worked so hard on acquiring. I hope future events within Merge Nymphs offer a stronger suite of rewards, and better trophies.

Is it too much to ask for an animated CG? Or Nymph that’s a higher level than four?